I appreciate a beautiful, strong woman. But when they say stupid things that insult us plain Janes, I get annoyed. Really annoyed. Here is a collection of quotes from one of the most stuck-up moms in Hollywood, Gisele Bundchen.
"I think it's better when you're natural, when you just do whatever you want, instead of doing classes where I see all these other people holding back because they've been trained with certain skills or techniques. I'm like, whatever."
'Atta girl. Let's celebrate the education of women and a great work ethic, and congratulate the hard work of your fellow females as they work to better themselves.
On her own body during pregnancy:
"I want to have lots of children... It doesn't matter if my body changes. It is the most marvelous thing. For example, they sometimes say that your breasts begin to sag, but I couldn't care less."
Not to toot her own horn, but her pregnant body is the "most marvelous thing." Never mind us pregnant mortals who have the the swollen ankles, backaches, sudden acne, and muscle strain. Gisele's body is mah-velous... simply mah-velous.
On gaining weight during pregnancy:
"I think a lot of people get pregnant and decide they can turn into garbage disposals. I was mindful about what I ate, and I gained only 30 pounds."
She has been quoted several times as bragging about her weight gain (or lack thereof) during her pregnancy. Every magazine I read has a quote of her touting how easy it is to stay so thin while you are pregnant. As a fellow pregnant garbage disposal, I take offense at this. It must be so easy to stay skinny... when you have a personal trainer and a nutritionist.
About giving birth:
"I gave birth in the bathtub," she claimed, referring to the Boston penthouse she shares with husband Tom Brady. Although, initial reports had suggested that her son's December 2009 birth took place at a Boston-area hospital. But, wait, it gets better...
"I wanted to be conscious and present for what was happening... I didn't want to be anesthetized. I wanted to feel."
Huh. I didn't know they gave out a Mother of the Year Award for "Able to Endure Excruciating Pain Unnecessarily." I wonder if she'd like to "feel" my labor, because I sure as Hell don't.
Again, about giving birth (and probably my favorite quote from Gisele):
"It wasn't painful, not even a little bit."
Forget Mother of the Year. Call the Pope! This one's going for sainthood!
And just in case we forgot, she has been quoted several times as saying:
"I didn't gain a lot of weight in my pregnancy."
Yeah, because we didn't hear you the first eighteen times.
And lastly, to brag even more about the glorious, pain-free, exhilarating feeling of labor:
"The next day, I was walking, I was washing dishes, I was making pancakes in the kitchen."
I hope her baby has three heads and colic.