Mommy Quote of the Week

"Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore." -- Ogden Nash

Honey! Look what Johnny brought home from school again!

Running into an old colleague of mine, I heard that a student from my old work, where I had been a teacher, got into some trouble recently. He asked to be excused from class to use the restroom, and, when released, went next door to an unlocked classroom. Inside, he stole the teacher's purse, containing her credit cards, some cash, and her keys. Most importantly, he stole the "A" key, a key that can open up any door in the entire school, making it highly valuable. Now, it's worth about $30,000 to replace every lock in the school, so this is one expensive key.

This star student went home that day and, to his credit, confessed to his parents about what he had done. However, instead of making their child return the stolen goods, or punishing him in another way, the parents decided to get in on the action.

They packed all of the kids in the car, drove back to the school and, using the "A" key, proceeded to rob the rest of the school. Everything was taken: computers, VCRs, audio and visual equipment, all the way down to personal items that belonged to the students and staff.

How were they finally caught? Well, the next day, our star student was bragging to his friends on the playground about his huge score.

Once the administration found out, it was over. Not only did Star Student get sent to Juvenile Hall, his parents were sent to jail and his brothers and sisters were thrown in foster homes. So instead of taking the opportunity to discipline their child, these parents separated their family indefinitely. Instead of using this as a chance to set a moral example for him, they may never see their son again. Instead of teaching him the difference between right and wrong, they lost all of their children as well as their freedom.

And they say parents don't have any interest in their children's schoolwork...

Inspired by this post, I am creating the Bad Parents of the Month award. Stay tuned each month to learn about the horrible things that parents around the world do to their children! And if you hear about something, email me the story so that they can be humiliated on my blog!

And I Thought MY Kitchen Was Scary...

The weird thing is, in my kitchen I have beans and refrigerator alphabet magnets! Ahhhh!

Mommy Quote of the Week

"Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex."

-- Bill Maher

Toddlers on a Plane!

Snakes?! That's nothing. Try calming down a toddler on an airplane... now that's scary!

I know this is an older news story, but I can't seem to get the scenario out of my head. According to the Associated Press, a two-year-old boy was so upset about his impending flight that he began fussing and crying, refusing to wear a seat belt. His grandparents insisted they could calm him down, but the toddler crawled under his seat and refused to come out. After a 15 minute delay, the airline staff asked them to get off the plane, much to the cheers and applause of the other passengers.

I still can't seem to decide what I would have wanted done in this situation, if I had to make the choice whether they stay or go.

As a mom, I understand the parents' struggle to calm down their son. I too have had to exit many a restaurant because of my child's behavior. But where can they take him on an airplane... outside? I have flown with my kids a couple times (once by myself), and it is extremely difficult, to say the least, to fully discipline your children when they know they are stuck there for hours at a time. You can't give them a time-out, can't send them to their room, and God forbid you spank them or someone calls Child Services. Anyone with a 2-year-old knows it is very difficult to calm a kicking and screaming child down when they are in the Tantrum Zone.

As an airline passenger, however, I also understand the passengers' frustration on being stuck on this plane. I've had to endure my seat being kicked, screeching children, and obnoxious drunk businessmen. I guess I just deal with it. It's what you expect from riding in coach, right?

What do you think?

Mommy Quote of the Week

"Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own."
-- Aristotle

Just a Little Something to Brighten Your Stressful Day

I'm usually not one for the cutsie things, but this really calms me down after a nerve-wracking day. It's a blog called Things That Make You Go Ahhh, and it solely features pictures of the cutest little furry creatures that make you... well, go "Ahhhhh!" (Actually, I usually go "Awwww," but that's just me.)

It will now be the blog I look at when I am tired of ridding the world of rude and annoying people.

Super Extra Special Weekend Bonus Edition!

I love this! Absolutely Bananas wants to know... and so I answer:

What were you doing 10 years ago?

1. teaching first grade

2. just started dating Hubby

3. kickboxing

4. shopping every weekend and getting a mani-pedi

5. going out to clubs every weekend

Five Snacks You Enjoy:

1. Stacy's Pita chips and hummus dip

2. Stacy's Pita chips and cottage cheese

3. Stacy's Pita chips and garlic pimento cheese dip (yes, they are that good!)

4. roasted almonds

5. Cracklin' Oat Bran

Five Songs That You Know All The Lyrics To:

1. the entire High School Musical soundtrack

2. I'm So Excited by the Pointer Sisters

3. Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go) by Wham

4. Button Up Your Overcoat from Follow Thru

5. Kiss by Prince

Five Things You Would Do If You Were a Millionaire:

1. Move back to California

2. Buy a piece of land and build a house from scratch

3. Give everyone in my family a share

4. Invest

5. Donate to St. Jude Children Research Hospital

Five bad habits:

1. Shopping too much

2. Interrupting

3. Rehashing old events (but where would this blog be without that, hmm?)

4. Forgetting to wear my glasses

5. Burning food

Five Things You Like To Do:

1. Make CD's

2. Play board games with my kids

3. Read tabloids

4. Watch movies

5. Write my blog and read others'

Five Things You Would Never Wear Again:

1. crop tops

2. crimped or permed hair

3. pink lipstick

4. leg warmers

5. jelly shoes (had to steal this from A.B. -- it's just so true!)

Five Favorite Toys

1. my iPod and iTunes

2. my Sodoku handheld

3. my Magic Bullet

4. Zoo Tycoon

5. Sorry

Five people to tag:

1. Sweepea's Lounge

2. The Sneeze

3. Stuff in My Brain

4. Chicken and Cheese

5. Creative-Type Dad

Instructions: Remove the blog from the top, move all blogs up one, add yourself to the bottom.

The Middling Monettes

Families Are Like Fudge

A Beautiful Life

Absolutely Bananas

The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

Mommy Quote of the Week

"Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You'll realize this as soon as they are born, and they start using sleep deprivation to break you." -- Ray Romano

Mallrats Should Be Exterminated

The kids and I were on a recent shopping trip at the mall when we stopped for a quick lunch. Volcano started talking about how his sandwich could dance and sing. Monkey was laughing as Volcano started to make everything on the table -- food, drinks, napkins, you name it -- dance along to his song.

We were having a great time when I saw some teenagers at the next table giggling. One of the boys was moving around his soda, mimicking Volcano with this stupid look on his face. I just looked at him with a smile. "That's cute..." I told him, "...when you're four."

This made all of his friends go "Ooh!" and laugh too. Sure enough, he stopped.

And the Award for the Weirdest Commercial Goes to...

At first I thought it was a new sci-fi movie. I was definitely disappointed...

Mommy Quote of the Week

"Parents are not interested in peace and justice, they're interested in peace and quiet." -- Bill Cosby.