You're Killing Me, Braxton Hicks!

I'm in my last month, and those contractions are coming. You know what I mean. The slightly painful but always annoying tightening of the abdomen that sometimes makes it hard to breathe. They are irregular and infrequent, and just plain irritating. What's frustrating about these guys is that these aren't the good, productive kind of contractions. These are the Heidi Montag of contractions: totally fake.

As you may know, these are called Braxton Hicks contractions. It does not mean labor is coming soon. On the contrary, it's just an "aid" to prepare my uterus for birth. I keep telling my uterus that I don't need help in that area. Instead, could my uterus help me pick out a name for the baby, or perhaps pay for a new stroller? That would be much more helpful to prepare me for birth. Needless to say, my uterus has a mind of its own, and the contractions continue.

My sister teases me and says, "Are you having the Toni Braxton contractions?" Ha ha ha. But it got me wondering: why are they called "Braxton Hicks" contractions? As it turns out, they are named after a guy. John Braxton Hicks was the English doctor who first described them as he investigated the later stages of pregnancy in the 1800's.

Grrrrrrr.... Does that sound fair to you? Some guy that's never felt a contraction in his life gets these guys named after him? Kind of annoying, isn't it? Although, an irritating annoyance is probably better named after a man than a woman, right?

So, without a role model or historical figure to sympathize with, I endure these symptoms, reassuring myself that these small irritations are just a sign that my little guy is coming soon.