Wednesday, August 27, 2008

How I Became a Sports Widow

When I married Hubby 9 years ago, I knew he was into sports. Like almost every guy, he obsessively watched games and sporting events on television. He scraped money together for Lakers' tickets and Dodger games. He had ESPN permanently plastered on his television. He played sports in high school and continued into college, lucky enough to be rewarded with scholarships, trophies, and plaques for his athletic skills. Upon graduation, he even became a team coach for his college alma mater. He began as their graduate assistant (which means no pay) and then eventually became the assistant coach for the university. Currently, he has been coaching at the high school level, for 9 years now.So, you could say, Hubby is not just a sports fan: he lives and breathes sports.

In a previous post on my other blog How to Get the Guy, my co-author Clemmy discussed how she's learned to deal with her guy's obsession with sports -- through compromise.

There is no reason for me to have expected his sports-obsession to change just because we got married. If you think marrying your man will change his habits, how he treats you, or his obsession with baseball, you are out of your mind. Because even after the ring's on the finger, he will continue to act exactly how he was before you got married. Don't expect your relationship to suddenly transform or get better just because you have rings on your fingers and are legally man and wife.

I knew this too. I knew going into the marriage that Hubby's sports-obsession would not change. Especially because now he was getting paid for it, and it puts food in my children's mouths. I would still have to endure the long hours of listening to that Sportscenter (yes, it is one word) theme music (da da duh -- da da DUNT!), Hubby retelling the play-by-play of "the most exciting game ever," and the nights of going to bed alone so that he could "just finish this play" on television. And now I know that "there's only 3 minutes left on the clock" actually means another 20. I'm used to the ache of sitting in the bleachers and watching yet another match of a sport I don't even like. A sport I know too much about for never even playing the game.

But I still find it frustrating -- because there are some things about the sports obsession that I will just never understand:

  1. Hubby works 9 to 10 hours a day, coaching this sport. Then he comes home and writes up plays, shifts rosters, and talks to his assistant coaches. When he's done, and is ready to relax, he turns on the television... and watches more sports!
  2. Whatever sport is on television (football, basketball, gymnastics, hockey, golf, dirt-biking, ping-pong...), Hubby will watch it with enthusiasm. I can't even talk to him, because he is in the zone. He can't hear or see anything other than the T.V. when sports are on. He's worse than the kids.
  3. Not only does he watch the game, but he'll watch the reports, the replays, and all the talk about that game -- the one he just watched! With the power of TiVo, I thought all of this would be in the past, but Hubby still insists on watching all the replays and discussion about something he just saw!
  4. Did you know there is always an important game on? It's always the preseason, or the semifinals, or the play-offs... and Hubby has to watch them all. Because, as he has told me numerous times, "Honey, this is a really important game I just can't miss." Funny, because that's why I thought we got TiVo, so you could, in fact, miss the game.

So, as the Olympics are ending and another season of sports comes upon us, I wanted to vent my frustrations with you as a Sports Widow. The remedy? I plan a lot of Girls' Nights Out. This gives him the chance to watch as much sports as he wants to, and me the chance to escape it. I guess that's what Clemmy was talking about when she meant "compromise."


Sweepea said...

Very good post! And congrats on winning our "You're the $H*%!" Award!

Anonymous said...

Wow! I thought I had it bad with my husbands sportscenter obsession. But, honey I feel for you. Poor you!

Dad Stuff said...

You need to find a good sports bar and enjoy.

clemmy said...

dad stuff actually has a good idea...with enough beer and hot wings, I can sit through any game! Haha.

Lanxi said...

I would answer, but the World Series of Poker is on, and I have to, really!

And I actually watch more football than Hero, but not nearly as much as in your house.

Carol said...

From one sport widow to another. I feel for you.

I find chocolate, blogging and a good book gets me through the days. Just.

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

My husband could join you--I am the ESPN nut here--it is on right now and hubby has taken the kiddos swimming ;)